主题：关于《劈波蹈海》翻译进程遭到干扰的说明以及向各位河友求助 -- 万年看客

第二章：

P30：One odd white thread ran through the whole of it: insofar as the Kings encountered anything better than obstruction in the white world, it could be traced more often than not to the influence of a most unlikely source, John D. Rockefeller.

误：……在金还未在白人世界遭遇阻碍时，却和一位看似最不可能跟他有关联的人联系起来……

正：……如果说金家族在白人的世界里除了阻挠障碍之外还遇到过些许善意与扶持，那么后者往往要归结于一位极其出人意料的大人物的影响力……

分析：原句中的Kings指代的不是一个人，而是全体金家人。anything better than obstruction字面意为“比阻碍更好的事物”，而非“尚未遇到阻碍”。

P31： Only he and a few partners knew that he had invented that very year the secret network of interlocking stock pledges--called a trust--through which he would levy a monopoly fee on the industrial development of the entire country.

误：……在那一年他创造了自己的股票抵押秘密关系网——也称为信托……

正：……他在那一年发明了一套相互连锁的股票质押秘密网络——他称其为托拉斯……

P31：The Baptists were descended from the Anabaptists of sixteenth-century Germany, who had rebelled against Martin Luther for not going far enough in his break with the Catholic Church.

误：那里的施洗礼者要追溯到16世纪的德国再洗礼派，作为背叛马丁.路德的一群人，在与天主教教堂分离后并没有走得很远。

正：浸信会的前身是十六世纪德国的再洗礼派。这一教派反对马丁.路德，认为他未能与天主教会彻底分道扬镳。

分析：误译的语法理解能力欠缺与宗教知识欠缺可谓相得益彰。

P32：At the time, no one realized that this strategic acquisition would make the twentieth-century demographics of Atlanta unique among American cities.

误：这次战略性的收购将会让亚特兰大20世纪的人口在美国城市中雄踞榜首

正：当时谁也没有意识到这项战略收购将使得二十世纪的亚特兰大具备在美国城市当中独一无二的人口分布。

分析：误译错误理解了demographic与unique的意思。

P34：……as whites in the South and North generally agreed that there were more important things to do in the world than to contend with each other over the status of the Negro, which was then fixed by science as lowly.

误：……南方白人与北方白人都觉得与黑人竞争实在是有伤体面……

正：……因为南方和北方的白人普遍认同了以下观点：在这世界上还有更重要的事情需要关注，一味为了黑人的地位而争斗不休实在没什么意思……

分析：按照误译，原文应为contend with Negro

P34：The reigning idea was that racial quarrels, while accomplishing nothing since the Civil War, had interfered with business, diverted reform campaigns from more productive fields, and hindered America’s new efforts to win a commanding position in the battle for global influence.

误：当时流行的理念是种族纷争——这个自从内战后就没有一点改善……

正：北方的主流观点认为种族纷争自从内战之后就再也没有带来任何实际好处……

P37：Mike King, later known as Martin Luther King, Sr., and still later as Daddy King, met her while she was studying there.

误：迈克.金以后会更名为大家所熟知的大马丁.路德.金，再以后被人称作金爸爸。

正：迈克.金——日后的老马丁.路德.金以及更久之后的金老爹

分析：兄弟之间才论大小，如大格拉古与小格拉古。父子之间要论老小。误译差了一辈。

P38：He became a professional preacher in the time-honored manner of the ambitious former slaves, before he had been inside a church that could afford an organ.

误：……从前他还去过穷得只能购买一架风琴的教堂。

正：……早在他第一次踏进一座买得起管风琴的教堂大门之前……

分析：风琴是昂贵的奢侈品，不是随便一家教会就能买得起的。

P40：let there be a brick house

误：要有一座砖场。

正：要有一座砖房子。

P43：I like your frankness, but do you think that more people will criticize you on account of my wealth than will criticize me on account of your theology?

误：……但是如此一来更多人会因为你倚仗我的财富来批评你，却不会再由于你的神学理论而批评我，你不认为是这样吗？

正：……但是你认为因为我的财富而骂你的人就一定会比因为你的神学观点而骂我的人更多吗？

P45：By this she meant that at Ebenezer she could never take the place of her mother.

误：在埃比尼泽教堂她永远也不想取代她母亲的位置。

正：换句话说她认为自己永远不能在以便以谢教会取代她的母亲。

分析：“不能”与“不想”不应混淆。

P48：Few people seemed to resent his manner, partly because it was common to ministers and mostly because he produced.

误：很少有人讨厌他的性情，一部分原因是处于认为认为这性情是牧师普遍有的，而大部分原因则是由于这正是他个人表现出来的。

正：金的言论看似自吹自擂，可是厌恶这套说辞的人却非常有限。部分原因在于当时的黑人教士大都是这个路数，但更主要的原因在于金的每一句炫耀都有实绩支撑。

分析：误译对于produce的理解不够深。

P49：There he visited biblical sites in Jerusalem, Bethlehem, and elsewhere……

误：在那里他游览了《圣经》中提到的耶路撒冷的一些著名地点，比如耶稣诞生地伯利恒……

正：在这里他寻访了耶路撒冷、伯利恒以及其他多处圣经故址……

分析：耶路撒冷与伯利恒是两个相互独立的城市，不是上下级关系。

P51：……when greeted by white people at the Chicago Opera, (he)often gave a pathetic mumbo-jumbo reply in the hope that he would be taken for an African diplomat instead of an American.

误：在芝加哥歌剧院白人迎接他的时候，他要说出感伤又莫名其妙的话，以传达一种期望：他希望人们把他当成美国外交官，而不是非洲外交官。

正：每当他去芝加哥歌剧院看戏的时候遇到白人观众向他打招呼，他总会含糊其辞地混过去，希望对方将自己当成来自非洲某国的外交官而不是美国人。

分析：误译的理解能力实在不敢恭维。此外In the hope that 指的是自己希望而不是向别人传达希望。

P53：Reverend King supplied the wish and the preparation, but it remained for strangers in the world at large to impose Martin Luther King’s new name upon him.

误：金牧师表明了心愿，给儿子时间去准备，让全世界的陌生人认可马丁.路德.金这个名字名副其实。

正：老金牧师希望儿子能接受这个新名字，也做了很多铺垫，但最终还是众多陌生人将马丁.路德.金这个名字强加在了他儿子的头上。

P55：?As a political leader, however, he suffered all the liabilities of an elitist intellectual.

误：作为一名政治领袖，他却承担着优秀知识分子应承担的责任。

正：然而作为一名政治领袖，他却背负着精英主义知识分子的一切缺点。

分析：韦氏词典对于liability的定义是one that acts as a disadvantage。

P55：he made matters worse by commenting that White had no brains

误：他还评论说白人缺乏头脑，让事态更加严重。

正：更糟的是他还公开声称怀特没长脑子。

分析：这个错误是审阅人员的失职。

P56：The first contribution out of Wilkins’ own typewriter was a sports story about Negro track stars, which, Wilkins dryly recalled, the beleaguered Du Bois allowed to run “tucked among the most august literary and sociological thinkers of the race.”

误：……威尔金斯淡淡地回忆着，杜波依斯决定让他“在种族里最令人敬畏的文学思想家和社会思想家中雪藏”。

正：后来他不露声色地回忆道，在他的软磨硬泡之下，杜博斯最终不得不同意将这篇稿件“塞在最威严的黑人文学家与社会思想家的文字之间”。

分析：tuck的宾语是 a sports story about Negro track stars而不是Wilkins

P58：Spurning all talk of appearances and strategies, he marshaled the raw prose for which he was famous.

误：他写了很多让他出名却有些不成熟的散文。

正：他抛弃了一切关于种族形象与斗争策略的辞令，亮出了自己赖以成名的凶猛笔锋。

分析：误译不仅不理解从句结构，也不理解raw的用法。

P59：The success of this traditional NAACP activity was marred, however, by the small numbers and by factionalism among the leadership.

误：这次全国有色人种协进会成功地被领导阶级的党派之争和一小部分人抹杀了。

正：这是协进会的惯常活动，但是这次活动的成功却并不算完美，首先是参与人数太少，其次活动领导层也陷入了分裂。

分析：mar做动词意为玷污而非毁灭。

P60：Remarkably, the expansion at Ebenezer accelerated until the church caught and passed its older and more established rival on Auburn Avenue, Wheat Street Baptist, where the building program for a new church stalled and then collapsed in mid-construction.

误：……那座教堂新建筑……才完成了一半就拆掉了。

正：……这家教会的新教堂修建计划先是拖延了很久，然后在施工期间又垮塌了。

分析：原文是collapse，不是dismantle。

P63：The Rockefeller associate wanted to oust the dictatorial Florence Read, saying that she was anything but a professional educator and had been only a Rockefeller secretary.

误：……她各方面都不错，但不是一位职业教育家……

正：……她根本不是专业教育家……

P67：……?where it had become traditional to say that there were only two kinds of students: those at Morehouse and those who wished they were.

误：……一种由来已久的说法是，关于莫尔豪斯学院只两种学生……

正：……按照摩豪斯的说法，一切学生分为两类……

分析：还是校对的责任。

P68：He abhorred religious tastes--especially the happy chatter about heaven and the cross--and looked upon religious ideas as a point of departure.

误：他痛恨宗教的优点……

正：他憎恶宗教品味……

分析：低级错误。

P70：The Soviet Union and the United States began to split the globe into two warring camps, each claiming to represent idealism against an empire of evil ambitions. Colonized peoples in Asia and Africa denounced the hypocrisy of the democratic nations that doggedly reasserted sovereignty over them.

误：苏联与美国逐渐将全球分化成两个阵营双方都声称自己坚持的主义能消灭邪恶帝国的野心。亚洲殖民地和非洲殖民地的人民前者民主国家的虚伪，坚定不移地维护自己的主权。

正：苏联和美国开始将全球分割成两大敌对阵营，双方都声称自己是理想主义的代表，对方是怀有邪恶野心的帝国。众多奉行民主制度的国家顽固地重申着自己对于亚洲与非洲殖民地的主权，此等虚伪行径理所当然地遭到了殖民地人民的激烈谴责。

P71：……they and the FBI would compile enough evidence to take before a grand jury, which declined to return an indictment.

误：联邦调查局还是搜集到了足够的证据，提交给了拒绝撤销起诉书的大陪审团。

正：他们和联邦调查局的探员们确实收集到了足够的证据并且将其提交到了大陪审团面前，但是大审判团拒绝起诉。

分析：不知撤销二字从何而来。

P74：Properly conceived, he argued, education provides “noble ends rather than a means to an end”.

误：金认为，如方法得当，教育提供的是“高贵的目的，绝不是置人于死地的手段”。

正：在他看来，构想得当的教育本身就应当是“崇高的目的而不是实现目的的手段”。

分析：看到end就想到死也是耿直。