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主题:【文摘】来讲讲汽车的名字 -- 无边落木

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  • 家园 【文摘】来讲讲汽车的名字

    Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.

    -- Will Rogers

    ACURA

    Always Catching Up, Rarely Ahead

    AUDI

    Accelerates Under Demonic Influence

    BMW

    Bavarian Money Waster

    (Backwards) Waste My Bucks

    Break My Wallet

    BUICK

    Built Using Inferior Car Knowledge

    Butt Ugly Inefficient Chevy Knock-Off

    CADILLAC

    Certified As Detroit's Inadequate, Lumbering Luxury Auto Car

    CHEVROLET

    Can Hear Every Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips

    Competely Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

    (CHEVY) Can't Have Expensive Vehicle Yet

    Constantly Having Every Vehicle Recalled Over Lousy Engineering Techniques

    CHRYSLER

    Company Has Recommended You Start Learning Engine Repair

    DAEWOO

    Da Awful Experience Was Owning One

    Depreciation Always Eclipses Worst Of Others

    DODGE

    Dead On Day Guarantee Expires

    Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

    FERRARI

    First Every Race Run, Always Really Incredible

    FIAT

    Fix It Again, Tony

    Futile Italian Attempt at Transportation

    FORD

    Fixed Or Repaired Daily

    Flips Over, Read Directions

    First On Recall Day

    Fast Only Rolling Downhill

    (Backwards) Driver Returns On Foot

    (Backwards) Don't Ride On Firestones

    GMC

    Got a Mechanic Coming?

    Garage Man's Companion

    General Motors Cashcow

    Guaranteed Mechanical Calamity

    HONDA

    Happy Owners Never Drive Angry

    Honest, Officer, Nobody Drank Anything

    Happy Owners Never Doubt Acquisition

    Had One, Never Did Again

    HYUNDAI

    Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive

    INFINITI

    It Never Found Its Niche, It's Truly Inconsequential

    ISUZU

    Is So Underpowered, Zooming Unlikely

    JAGUAR

    Just A Gorgeous, Underperforming Anglican Rip-Off

    JEEP

    Just Expect Endless Problems

    Journey Eventually Ends Perpendicularly

    Just Empty Every Pocket

    KIA

    Korea's Incompetence Amazing

    LAND ROVER

    Loud, Agonizing, Noisy Drive - Rattles On Virtually Every Road

    LEXUS

    Luxurious, Expensive, (a) Xenophile's Ultimate Score

    LINCOLN

    Large Income? No Class? Own Lincoln Now.

    LOTUS

    Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious

    MAZDA

    Mismanages A Zillion Dollars Annually

    Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

    MERCEDES-BENZ

    Mostly European Rich Can Enjoy Driving Expensive Sedans, Beautifully Engineered, Notable Zippy

    MERCURY

    Most Engines Run, Contingent Upon Repair Yesterday

    Mediocre Engine Revs Constantly, Really Yucky

    MITSUBISHI

    Management Incessantly Tolerates Socially Unacceptable Behavior, Ignoring Sexual Harassment Incidents

    NISSAN

    No Inspired Styling, Still, Accelerates Nicely

    OLDSMOBILE

    Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday

    PLYMOUTH

    Please Leave Your Money Out Under The Hood

    PONTIAC

    Put On Notice To Improve A Car

    Plenty Of Numbskulls Think It's A Cadillac

    Product Overabundance Necessitates Traditional Incentive Application Constantly

    PORSCHE

    Pity Only Rich Suckers Can Have 'Em

    SAAB

    Send Another Automobile Back

    Swedish Autos Always Breakdown

    Sure Ain't A Bimmer

    SATURN

    Same American Trash Under Revised Name

    Stickers Are Truly Unnegotiable, Rebates Nonexistent

    SUBARU

    Sport Utility Buffs Are Relatively Unimpressed

    Sorta Useful, But Are Really Underpowered

    SUZUKI

    Samurai Upended, Zealous Underwriters Keep Insisting

    TOYOTA

    Truly Obvious You Overestimate This Automaker

    Too Often Yankees Overprice This Automobile

    VW

    Virtually Worthless

    Vice Wagon

    VOLVO

    Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

    Got any fresh ideas?

    [GLOW=255,RED,2][/GLOW]

    • 家园 关于 KIA 补充一个

      KIA 是南朝鲜的“起亚”的英文音译。不过 KIA 的另一个英文意思是“阵亡” (Killed In Action 的缩写)。真不知道这些南朝鲜人有没有在起英文名字前研究过。

      类似的例子是以前通用公司的一个汽车牌子 NOVA 。在英文里的意思是“新星”。但是在西班牙语里的意思是“不走”。可想而知其在西班牙语系国家的销量。

      不过“不走”也就是汽车不走罢了。“阵亡”可是连人带车一起完蛋。而且“Killed In Action”实际上还可以理解为开车时死掉。所以这款车在北美的销路也不怎么样。

      • 家园 据说HONDA在马来西亚一开始生意很差,本田的人后来才发现HONDA的马来语发音和当地的“大粪”什么的类似。

        就像马季的那个相声一样“蜣螂牌香烟”。后来一查,蜣螂是屎壳郎的意思!

    • 家园 BMW: buy my wife
    • 家园 另外一个版本的BMW -- Business, money, Woman/Women

      Or Be My Wife

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